Wednesday, March 16

Marrying My Cousin

No, not me silly. But I did get a chance to watch the programme from yesterday. I won't dwell too much on what happened - basically it was about a guy named Gark traveling back home to Lahore to marry a cousin he had been "engaged" to the past four years. Frankly the programme had little to do with cousins and more to do with marrying back home in general.

Personally I found the whole case tragic and touching in equal measure. The guy obviously didn't know what he was getting into - possibly his own fault for being so disinterested the last four years (man, I'm glad I can communicate with my folks, and also that I'm not in the situation of not having been back home since I was five). Still, it was clear the marriage wasn't in his own heart but instead in that of his mother and sisters.

He was my hero though. Obviously a man of more patience than me, he sacrificed quite a lot when he decided to go ahead with the marriage. Ok, sure, it may all pan out for him (if he doesn't achieve happiness on his own, I'm sure his tyrannical sisters will ensure it - "YOU WILL BE HAPPY") and he did have a responsibility to a girl he had "taken" for the last four years, but if it doesn't work out like he fears it won't, he's giving up quite a lot for his family and relatives. His "vicious circle of happiness" was bang on.

Yes ok, perhaps I'm being a bit sensitive here. But although I'm not marrying a cousin I've never met I can and will further relate to Gark's situation, although I'm not certain how similar our fates will be.

My heart goes out to him.

5 comments:

  1. >>He was my hero though. Obviously a man of more patience than me, he sacrificed quite a lot when he decided to go ahead with the marriage.

    interesting. happiness vs family requirements. hell, i don't see why people marry cos they have to and not cos they want to. i never realised people who were relatively weak-minded and pushed into things (didn't watch it but from the sounds of your blog) were heroes man. it's about perception i guess. i mean hey- keep your family happy for a few months and potentially live the rest of your life unhappy or marry the person you want to marry and be happy for the rest of your life. hmm....i know what i'd choose. must be the reason i'm not your hero.

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  2. >>.. marry the person you want to marry and be happy for the rest of your life..

    interesting. but erm...alittle unrealistic, would you not say?


    This is dedicated to blogger: Its a low lying, google-owned, filthy pile of horse manure. Anyone who thinks/says otherwise is prolly not far from the above description.

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  4. I didn't watch the programme, but from what i've read on here it seems like he was almost forced into marrying her. I've found that when people (i maybe generalising a little here) marry in this way, they almost lead a double life when they are back in the UK. They start dating other girls/guys and 'play away from home'.

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  5. gotta agree with ro and goldie, shak, he's no hero, he could well be causing problems down the line for him and her (and any kids) just to satisfy his elders and overbearing sisters today.

    personally i think the ideal is happiness for both you and your family, not just one or the other.

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