Rehabilitating Mr. Wiggles

You can always trust Mr Wiggles to keep it real:



I think it's quite established what I think of work and those who pursue it out of love (in short, you're all lying to yourselves). I'm glad to see I'm not the only one, and look forward to the day when society finally catches up. It's slowly happening.

Food: Mercado

Now this was more like it. Unlike yesterday, where I felt the place we were eating in wasn't quite able to facilitate a group of twenty or so, tonight Mercado showed how it should be done. Which is strange since on paper it was a much worse place - not as clean, more familiar than formal service and some very strange decoration. Still I guess vibe isn't really something you can define on paper.

So yes, it was a fun place to eat, especially in a big group. But the food wasn't too bad either, even though the majority of us were baffled by the (fully halal) menu - and even after eating most of it we still weren't sure what the difference was between a fajita and a burrito. Luckily I was able to sample a wide variety of items due to my geographical location, and I have to say I have no regrets overeating.

I did think that at £17 a head (after a 15% discount) that the food was slightly overpriced, but I suspect that this was due to some members of the party exploiting a split bill by going a little overboard with the five quid mocktails (once again proving that one drink policies work well in larger groups like these).

But in any case I will recommend the place nonetheless, if only for the bags of fun we were able to have during our time there.

Food: ORA

Perhaps I just go to eat out more than I should, but I'm continually finding it more and more difficult to be impressed by places like these. Yes it was clean, yes it was lush, yes the food wasn't bad and yes the service was great. We ordered a la carte, and with the option of halal chicken, lamb, beef and duck we had quite a few options. I stuck to the prawns for starters, the green chicken curry for my main and sampled a range of lovely desserts (but stick to the Chocolate Cheesecake or Pineapple Pie) and all were quite good.

Thinking back, I have no idea why I wasn't as impressed as I should have been. I guess it was a mood thing, which might indicate exactly what was lacking in ORA. It was another ICSS even and so heavily subscribed; although the venue should have been commended for just accommodating such a big party it wasn't able to facilitate interaction in the way other places could. The place was quite noisy, open and lacked intimacy and once again a long thin table killed any chance of socialising. Perhaps it would have been better for a smaller group? Or perhaps these flaws are only tested with a big party such as the one tonight.

The bottom line was quite good though - after a 50% discount we ended up paying around £20 a head which was quite reasonable considering we got three courses and a drink. I wasn't left hungry either, so the portions were just right too.

It would be unfair for me to not recommend ORA, so I'm going give it the benefit of the doubt and put its lack of atmosphere down to how it wasn't able to contain larger parties. If you're going with friends then it might be a good place to eat; unfortunately I wasn't able to determine this this time around.

Abstruse Goose

Emo special!



Yes, yes I know. Pathetic. But the truth is that I am lucky enough to have lots of friends and I do always seem to have lots of various things to do, and yet I don't seem to place the same importance on these things as my peers. Maybe I'm just spoiled and take it all for granted... Or perhaps it's only after having something you realise exactly how important it is.

Damn green grass.

Dil Dil, Pakistan

I think I'm quite lucky in that I'm able to visit Pakistan so relatively often. We tend to visit every two years for around the same number of weeks (which just happens to be my own personal limit), and as such our experience of going back home can be quite different to those of others. Oh and that reminds me: nothing much tends to happen during my trips back so unlike with my other holidays there won't be any daily coverage. I know how some of you can't stand those.

Essentially it comes down to training. Like most people who were force fed the subcontinent during the school summer holidays, I had a horrid time over there when I was a kid. It was unclean, I couldn't talk to anyone, the food sucked... and of course there was the toilet issue. To be fair I had it better than most; most of our time was spent between Karachi and Hyderabad which were established and quite cosmopolitan compared to the villages and pinds my friends had to endure. Still, despite our relative comfort we did still have the infamous water and power cuts, and still had to swallow what seemed like deliberately awful tasting antimalarials each day.

During university, trips did become more scarce but they also still happened. Eventually as family migrated to Karachi we stopped visiting Hyderabad altogether which made the whole thing more straightforward. The standard of life in Karachi improved over time while my own fussiness and impatience reduced with maturity, and all of a sudden I found myself actually enjoying my trips to Pakistan. Since graduating I've been at least once every two to three years. Relationships with family also matured as I discovered that it wasn't my language skills that were the problem but my inability to relate to them. I learned to adapt to and tolerate the instability of utilities (power cuts are now scheduled which makes things easier), and even squatting became second nature.

But overall trips more or less follow the same pattern. There's always a wedding or something to attend, after which the majority of time is spent doing the rounds and attending dawats (or dinner invitations). My father has twelve siblings, each of whom insist on feeding us - although unlike other people these are a pleasure to attend and not a chore at all. As time goes on the family of each sibling grows, as does the dynamics within, so it's always fun to catch up (I've given up trying to remember all the names of my nieces and nephews though). They also appreciate the trouble taken to get to see them so are always welcoming and comforting.

Next up, there's the clothes shopping. As some of you know, the majority of my clothes are Asian, and since we visit so often they all more or less are bought and tailored during trips to Pakistan. There are also other random things going on that never usually happen, but I'll talk about some of those in a separate post.

For those who ask how dangerous it is to visit Karachi, well to be honest there's never been a right time to go for a decade now. So yes, I guess we do take a risk, but as with most places of this type there are various ways to adapt to and mitigate those risks - I don't travel alone or too late, I stay away from obvious hot spots and leverage my innate pindu-ness (which most in the UK have witnessed first hand) to lower the chance of a kidnapping. That said, we did have an earthquake this time around which I couldn't really do anything about; having said that even though we were awake at the time we didn't notice anything happening (and I know I should be thankful but a part of me is a little disappointed at that). Oh and there were around five or six political assassination in Karachi during my stay there - once again, not that I noticed.

But still two weeks is and probably always will be my limit. This is less to do with Pakistan and more to do with homesickness, even though I do feel more at home in Karachi than anywhere else other than London. And so I don't leave with a heavy heart; instead I know I'll be back there sooner or later; not because I have to, but because I want to.

My First Rishwat

That means bribe. And giving, not taking.

I know we always hear the old stories about how you need to carry a few rupees while driving in India and Pakistan to pay off coppers who give grief to passer bys, but despite being in a car for most of the time while travelling in Karachi I never once got to see it done myself. Until today of course (which is kind of why I'm writing this post, but I suspect you knew that).

It was pretty much how you would imagine. It goes something like this:

1. A policeman pulls us over.
2. I'm told by my cousins to keep my mouth shut (the only thing that could give us away since I was in the habit of dressing even more natively than the natives).
3. The cop then hassles the driver for his documents.
4. The cop then creates a flimsy excuse for ticketing.
5. The driver "makes a phone call".
6. The cop sweats it out and then falls for the bluff and starts negotiating.
7. The driver ends up 100 rupees out of pocket.
8. We go on our way.

To be honest it wasn't that thrilling. Still at least that's one more thing I can tick off my todo list.

Made in Pakistan

The vast majority of my clothes are bespoke. They're all cut by hand and stitched by machine one at a time. Of course, I'm not talking about some fancy custom suits or anything; no these are my clothes of choice, the stuff I wear whenever I can, my shalwar kameezes and qurtas, made of fabric I pick myself and then sent to good old Jameel for him to put together for me and only me. A suit costs around a tenner to source and produce, so we're really not talking about big ticket items here.

Nevertheless this does mean that I appreciate hand made stuff. I've seen fabric being knitted and then dyed. I've witnessed first hand the cutting and sewing that goes on. I've personally thanked the tailor who has, with his own hands, created something to hide my modesty and keep me warm (well, ish).

On the other hand I do also have some mass market stuff - you know from places like Gap and the like. Despite my relationship with tailors and the like, I am desensitised to items which make a shop rack. As far as I'm concerned they just appear on the shop rack by magic.

Today, I accompanied my father to a denim factory to see a friend of his. Although I've been to some factories before, I can't remember visiting or having access to one of this size and scale. Six thousand skilled workers and tens of production lines gives an idea of the capacity and output of the place, but more than that it was the machinery, both literally and metaphorically, which really impressed me.

Production was a mixture of manual labour and automated process. There were different sections for cutting, stitching, washing (it turns out that some jeans are actually quite literally washed with stones), quality assurance and packing, all in units of thousands at a time. Amusingly most of the cutters were men and most of the stitchers were women, but apart from that particular observation the workforce was mixed.

And they weren't just making do with what they had - no, they had access to industrial quality equipment, processes and management. Chain mail gloves for the cutters, health and safety notices including evacuation maps and fire handling equipment and multiple staff notice board listing union members and leaders were the subtle signs of professionalism here. More obvious was the heavy security and how power was all generated onsite. A lot of workplaces are quite proud of the ISO accreditations they've worked hard for, and it's easy to see why. I wonder how the standards here compare to those of factories in other countries?

I really missed my camera. There were so many shots screaming to be taken; not that I would have necessarily been able to - the looks we were getting were firmly placed somewhere between "dirty" and "curious". Similarly, I really wanted to talk to some of the people there, but I figured that was equally impossible.

And just like with my ethnic clothes, here before my eyes I could finally see the value being added to raw materials. This is where that twenty pounds (or at least part of it) went. How much to these particular workers, I'm not sure but I'm not sure I'll be taking stuff off the rack for granted any more. I even started wondering how many people were involved in the clothes I was wearing at the time.

Today was most definitely one of the highlights of my trip so far, both from an informative and enjoyable point of view. And despite not having anything at all to do with the factory, I couldn't help but feel a little proud of what Pakistan is able to achieve. Of course there's always room for improvement and I'm sure there was plenty of the bad stuff that I didn't see, but still, the potential and attitude was definitely there.

It certainly made me wonder how much the country was capable of if it wasn't bogged down with corruption and instability. And ironically just as I was thinking this in the car while leaving Korangi we happened to witness a car being held up by two motorcyclists. It's just such a shame.

Going Home: A Blessing, Not A Curse

So here I am, packed and ready to embark on a two week break to Pakistan. No, I'm not going for any particular reason; we visit every two years or so and it just happens to be that time again. But still, I am looking forward to catching up with family and just spending some quality time in Karachi.

But more than that, I'm also looking forward to visit for another reason. And so this is where the clichéd lecture begins. Apologies in advance.

You see, as patronising as it may sound to my friends and family over there, the biggest and most valuable thing I bring back from my regular trips to Pakistan is what I believe to be a good sense of grounding. Yes, I realise that I sound exactly like our fathers did back in the 80s and 90s, but it's only over time that you realise exactly why they wanted us to retain links with our second homes. Of course part of it was due to tradition and duty and a lot of it was due to family, but I think our parents also wanted us to see exactly how lucky we are.

While people over there are putting up with water and power cuts, we start citing our human rights when our broadband goes down. Corruption is institutional and indeed a tool to survive, while we lament after we miss out on a killer designer label sale. People over there celebrate when they finally get a television on which to watch the news; here we do the same but with a fancy handbag or watch (one of which would probably pay for fifty televisions). Some of my own family work over 12 hours a day; not for a promotion or bonus but just to hold on to a job that pays just enough to feed their families.

But the lesson here isn't to be thankful. I like to think that most people are grateful for what they have. No, the real point is that despite all these things they all still seem much happier than many of those who live under better circumstances. And bringing this a little closer to home there does seem to be a correlation between those who, like me, make regular visits to the home of their parents or grandparents and the content way in which they live their life over here. The priorities, energy and focus of these people all seem fundamentally different. Whether one causes the other, I'm not quite sure.

Of course we should all strive for better and I'm also not suggesting anyone to artificially resist the opportunities and facilities we have here out of protest. But it does raise an eyebrow when people with much less are much more content than we are. We're blessed that we have such an accessible way to see this stuff close up, and personally I think it's a mistake that so many of us pass up the opportunity.

Film: The Chronicles of Narnia: The Voyage of the Dawn Treader

I was so underwhelmed by the first Chronicle that I didn't make much of an effort to watch the second, Prince Caspian, on the big screen. I did eventually watch it on television, and I was actually surprised at how much I enjoyed it. In any case it was enough to prompt me to watch the third film in the cinema - more so seeing as The Voyage of the Dawn Treader was my favourite book of the series. There's just something about travelling to the edge of the world that turns me on.

But what of the film? Well in terms of enjoyment it ranks somewhere between the last two films. Admittedly it was pretty faithful in terms of the major events, but there was something rushed, something shallow, about the whole deal which made the ending a little anti-climatic. There was zero character development (well apart from the obvious one), and the whole thing seemed like it was a chore or burden to make. I'll ignore the 3D for now (except to say that, as usual, it was an irrelevance).

That said, I wasn't as disappointed as I was with Wardrobe. Either way I can't quite bring myself to recommend this for a cinema viewing, so instead I'll say that it absolutely does at least deserve a watch at home.

New Music

Ainvayi Ainvayi - Band Bajaa Baaraat

The song that pretty much sums up the film for me - fun, colourful and simple.

Dooriyan Hain Zaroori - Break Ke Baad

I don't know what it is about this that I like it so much. Perhaps it's how manufactured it is that makes it so easy to listen to. I can't help being happy when listening to it.

Adhoore - Break Ke Baad

Okay I admit it, this is only a bonus that slipped in the above. Still, it compliments it well, almost to the point where I get the two mixed up.

Maula Mere Maula - Anwar

I really don't have to explain how much of a tune this is - I'm ashamed to say that I was only reminded to add it to my playlist after hearing it on Sonia Deol's Bollywood tracks of the last decade.

What's My Name Feat Drake - Rihanna

Rihanna is very up and down. I don't like some of her stuff, most of it is okay, but then every now and then she releases a track that I absolutely dig, like this one. Shame about the Drake bit though.

Say My Name - Destiny's Child

A song I really liked Back In The Day, but never got to add to my current playlist. Glad it's back.

The Isle of Man

Telling people you're planning to spend a week in the Isle of Man generally results in one of three reactions. The first is that of those who have heard of the place and would like to go themselves at some point. The second are also from those who have heard of it but then ask "what the hell are you going there for?". Finally there is the suggestion I should visit Southampton on the way. Quite.

The truth is that due to having relatives there I've regularly been visiting the Isle of Man for almost 25 years now. It was the first place I flew to without my parents and perhaps even totally on my own, and as such I have collected some pretty poignant memories over the years. I'm actually quite proud to be able to say I've been there multiple times, as a kind of temper to my more "exotic and adventurous" travels. And of course there is a certain kudos to visiting the home of Stuart Baggs.

Of course there's not really much to do there as a tourist and on this trip most of my time was spent just hanging with my cousins and vegging out in front of television Christmas movies. Still there are a few things on the Isle of Man which, in my mind, can only be found by travelling to the island. My top five (in no particular order) are:

1. Getting there. It's like being part of an exclusive club flying to a special place, from the twin propeller planes that take you there (three to four seats wide) to the tiny airport on the other side, the whole deal is very quaint and unique.
2. The Promenade in Douglas. Most Islanders don't get why, but I do love it there. Specifically I love the sweeping arch starting from the ferry terminal and curving all the way to the cliffs on the other end. In some peculiar ways it's very Monkey Islandish.
3. Strand Street. Especially the Marks and Spencer at the end.
4. Marcy's House. A bit of a personal one here, but if there's one thing an eight year old will always remember about a place it's an upside down house.
5. Glen Maye. Although there's a lot to be said about the natural beauty of this and the other Glens on the Island, Glen Maye is of particular value to me – I'm almost compelled to drop by each time I visit the Island, walking along the stream until we hit the pebble beach and cove at the end. It's a magical place, if only for the memories it invokes when I get there.
   

I guess seeing the place every five years or so makes it easier to visualise certain fixed points in my own life, and ultimately that's why the place is so special to me. Which actually makes it quite sad when I consider that this may be one of my final visits there, as my relatives increasingly look to move away to the mainland.

Of course it turns out that the Island feels the same about me – or at least that's how I chose to read the two flight cancellations, the aborted take-off and aborted landing at City today. Although the Island is relatively close, the normally three hour transit took eight instead. It remains to be seen if that journey becomes another fond memory of another brilliant trip to the Isle of Man.

EDIT: But of course you already know this, seeing as I wrote about my last trip there in 2005. I'm glad to see that my sentiments are the same now as they were then.

Cyanide & Happiness

Following on from the XKCD strip a couple of weeks ago, here's another perfectly valid reason to end relations:



Although this time I suspect it happens more often in the Muslim community than we'd like to think.

Shak's Choice: Anushka Sharma

I'm going to start this post off by saying that I don't actually think Anushka is that stunning. She's not ugly of course, but she's not a raw beauty either.



But then it's precisely this well grounded vibe that makes her so compelling. She's oozes happiness, as demonstrated by that oft-worn cheeky smile, and dances in a way that screams how fun she is. She's talented too - she's obviously on the screen for her personality and acting skills more than her sex appeal.

Anushka just goes to show that positive energy and contentment can be just as attractive as anything physical. The lesson here is to just keep smiling and be happy!

Film: Band Baaja Baaraat

You know, sometimes the only reason you want to go watch a Bollywood flick is to have some fun. Not drama, not emotion and not a freaking moral, but just plain and simple fun. Luckily, BBB happens to be an example of a film that delivers on this requirement in spades. Weddings are, of course, fun already, so it kind of goes without saying that a film about a couple of students who go into wedding planning would be too.

But still, kudos to both Anushka Sharma and Ranveer Singh for playing a pair of charming, sweet and, well, fun youngsters. It did take a while for me to warm up to Ranveer but once I got over his initial tomfoolery I was sold. Anushka, of course, had me from the get go.

I guess the beauty in the film is in its simplicity. There's no gimmicks here, no exotic locations or outrageous plot devices to spoil it all. Even ancillary stuff like the songs and costume are brilliantly down to earth. Sure, it's all very predictable and not much of it sticks once the film is over, but I couldn't help but smile throughout.

Masses of feel good factor to be had here. Recommended.

Shoes Glorious Shoes, 2011 Edition

I had a mixed reaction the last time I gave my opinion on the state of ladies' footwear. Some found it quite insightful and even useful, while others considered it the end of any chance I would ever have with a willing woman. But hey, this blog has never been about me being on the pull, and if helping certain girl mates who clearly can't pick footwear means I have to live my life alone, well then that's a sacrifice I'm more than willing to make.

Considering how long ago I first wrote about this topic, I guess girlie shoe fashion hasn't changed that quickly. That said for some reason we've had a raft of new styles come in over the past year or so – and there's no doubt I'm noticing them more now that I'm on a commute.

Judging by the terrible quality of style and design I can only imagine that shoe designers everywhere are so bored that they had to invent anything. What's depressing is how so many are willing to part with their cash in order to justify what can only be described as a broken design decision making process.

But anyway, let's talk specifics shall we? Don't worry there is some good news, but I'll leave that till last.

First up lets revisit that particular bug bear of mine – peep toes. To be honest I've somewhat softened my stance on these, but that's more due to becoming familiar with them rather than liking them for what they are. But that original distaste has now returned after seeing what I suppose some consider to be the natural progression – peep toe boots. Putting aside the fact that these make no logical sense, they just plain look stupid too. It's quite simple really – if you're covering up most of your foot up to your ankle (or higher), then to show your toes is kind of absurd:


And of course, the more of your foot you show in a boot, the more absurd it looks. Fully open toes on a boot? The show of a heel even?


Like I said, absurd. But not as absurd as flip flop boots. I mean look, subject to the feet wearing them, I love flip flops. And of course, like any man, I love boots. However putting the two together is just insanity. I'm actually finding it hard to carry on talking about these bizarre creations of man; that's how much I despise them. They really are the biggest crime I'm going to talk about today:


More awful examples of these monstrosities here.

Next up are brogue shoes. Now I'm going to admit that I have mixed feelings about these than the above and although some are awesome, some do make me feel uneasy. I guess I see a lot of them as masculine and am put off my them in the same way I would be seeing a girl in a men's suit, with a shirt, tie and braces and bowler hat; and we all know that cross dressing is not sexy, even if you just restrict that to your shoes. So avoid these:


But even if you do decide to go for these, then please please please don't forget your socks. On the other hand, losing the laces, adding more colours and a heel make brogues awesome. In short, keep them feminine and we're all good:


But hey, let's end on a positive note. Although I'm normally not too fussed about military boots (see my aversion to masculinity, above), I absolutely love the zipped and deliberately unlaced style making the rounds at the moment:


There's just something totally hot about the comfort, casualness and carefreeness of these things – combine them with a pair of skinny jeans and baggy top (big hair optional) and you've pretty much made my day. The weird thing is that no one seems to know what I'm talking about when describing them - even the few girls (random or otherwise) I've seen wearing them didn't think the style of boot had a name when I asked them for one. Apparently they can be found in River Island and those independent shoe shops you find around Oxford Street or All Saints. I've also seen similar on Ebay. They're awesome and cheap so there's no reason not to buy yourself a pair; the best colours are anything dirty - dirty grey, dirty khaki or dirty black.

Till next time!

In Conversation with Akshay Kumar, Katrina Kaif and Farah Khan

The two headlining stars and director of Tees Maar Khan were in town today to promote their upcoming film. Much in the same way they recorded an interview with Aamir Khan, Raj and Pablo were once called upon to represent both the Asian Network and British Muslims to the visiting Bollywood stars. Sigh.

But still, I guess I'm used to Raj and Pablo's train wreck style of interviewing enough to ignore any misgivings I have - between them and the pre-fielded audience questions, the whole thing was pretty much a wasted opportunity. At this point I'll once again cast my vote for Sonia Deol to take over, well, any and all contact with the outside world. A special nod goes to the Asian audience - we represented ourselves fully in our lack of decency, respect and organisation. Forget trying to queue up or anything. Still I must admit I loved the guy in the audience who kept holding up a poster of Kaif each time her name was mentioned.

So now that I've got my various moaning about the state of the BBC Asian Network out of the way, what of Akshay, Katrina and Farah? Well first up it was clear that Farah may as well have not been there. In terms of popularity she was well in third place behind the other two, but respect to her for knowing what her place was.

Next up was Akshay, and once again I was impressed by the live appearance of a Bolywood actor. He was genuinely funny - even though ironically what he was saying wasn't. He's one of those people with the right sense of timing, voice and personality that would make even a serious point sound amusing. According to my friends he was also better looking in real life than on the big screen. Perhaps it was my cynicism (or hate, whatever), but I did detect a little chauvinism in him - he didn't let either of the other ladies complete any of their answers without having the need to cut in and elaborate on their behalf. Not cool.

Finally there was Katrina Kaif. From the distance I was seated (that was, right at the back) she looked absolutely stunning in her little black number. Quite interestingly I noticed that she kept her coat on - not only that but she was constantly adjusting it to cover up as much as possible (even as she was telling us about her concerns and with preparation for Sheila Ki Jawani). Content-wise there were no surprises here and although she was friendly and sensible I can't quite say I was amazed by what she had to say. I will admit to being interested in finding out she had sisters living in London. Still looking as she did she didn't really have to say much, although I have to admit I was slightly less impressed when I saw her a bit closer up as she left the studio.

Still, the whole thing was a lot of fun and I'm glad I had the chance to attend. It was good to see and hear both Akshay and Katrina in person, and of course for me to have the chance to publicly declare my love for Katrina during a quiet bit - her turning and waving toward me was well worth looking the fool. Swoon.

XKCD

It's the attention to detail that counts:



I may or may not have declined rishta for lesser reasons.

New Music

Tees Maar Khan OST - Tees Maar Khan

Hmm. Not much to hear here. Of course Sheila Ki Jawani gets a big nod (and much more), while I'm still undecided about Badey Dil Wala and Wallah Re Wallah. The rest can be safely ignored.

Kya Se Kya Ho Gaya - Raghav

This is the second Raghav pick in as many releases, and I'm starting to get worried now. It doesn't help how this is such a massive tune. I always knew he had it - I guess it takes a bombing and re-rise to really shine.

Film: Break Ke Baad

Despite being a Bollywood fan I think it's fair to say that I always watch a film of the genre from the "outside in". I see it for what it is - a guilty pleasure or classic form of escapism that has no real relevance to my life. But that was before I watched Break Ke Baad, a film that I personally related to so much that it's going to be difficult writing a review about it without making it personal. For that reason I'm going to split it into two.

As a film, I thought it was great. The plot was sensible and made sense, and there wasn't even any of the usual post-interval chaos we usually get. It was well paced and balanced, and at no point did I feel I was watching filler. I can't remember any silliness or scenes added purely for the sake of it.

The acting was standard fare, although the cast were hot - Deepika of course goes without saying, but I even really liked Imran Khan for once too. They had some wonderful support and ancillary characters too. The soundtrack wasn't all that as a soundtrack, but seemed to fit film perfectly as commentary or background music. The script was funny yet down to earth and charming, choosing not to ride on any cheap gags or gimmicks. I did scratch my head over the depiction of the Gold Coast, but that could have just been since I have such vivid memories of the place myself.

Overall the film was very well produced. From the embedded credits to the digital projection, the whole thing was very easy on the eye, smooth and lacking of any of the rough edges we've become accustomed to. So yes, even if you have no interest in the subject matter I'd say that this is still a film worth watching.

But of course I also had my personal interest and connection to what the film was asking and talking about: the whole independence versus co-dependence debate, whether a relationship should be an aside to ambition and if love and happiness really are such separate concerns. Take away Deepika's character Aaliyah (granted, a pivotal part of the film) and you're pretty much left with my story - I am Abhay Gulati. Or something. To be honest I don't think much is answered in the Bollywood world where everyone does manage to get their cake and eat it, but it was still nice to see Bollywood's take on the issue.

Overall I found Break Ke Baad a pleasure to watch and maybe even one of the best Bollywood flicks I've seen over the last twelve months. Much recommended.

Film: Megamind

It always amuses me how these animated films almost always come in pairs. Bug's Life hit with Antz, The Wild was put up against Madagascar and now Megamind turns up mere weeks Despicable Me - because you know, villains-turn-good is such a reoccurring theme in film.

But hey, it's not like a lack of originality has ever caused me to complain about a movie. And in fact, despite the particular plot line, the two films are quite different on other levels; I found Megamind to be much more adult, mature and sophisticated than Despicable, both in terms of humour, story and theme. I didn't laugh out loud as much with this film, but it was just as awesome anyway.

Perhaps unsurprisingly the younger kids in the audience didn't seem to appreciate the lack of visual humour and directly told story though, so it's arguable that the film may not be as quite fit for use as the other options out there, but I don't think it's fair to knock it for that.

Otherwise the standard applies here and Megamind certainly delivers the goods: great animation, excellent voice acting and a package that will charm the pants off anyone over the age of seven or so. Much recommended.

Film: Monsters

Despite the title you shouldn't go into this film thinking it's some kind of science fiction or horror film; not that Monsters is a deliberate attempt to pull the wool over the eyes of the unexpectant - I knew that this was more a buddy-cum-romantic road movie than survival horror before deciding to watch it. It's safe to say that the Monsters of the title provide the context rather than focus here.

So yeah, in that sense there aren't many surprises - boy and girl are thrown together and forced to spend some serious time in each other's company, and finally grow to depend and fancy the pants off of each other. In fact I'd say this journey they took wasn't even that original - the guy's a prat with a heart, the girl devotes to him way too early, but it all works out in the end (excuse the spoiler).

But despite my lack of enthusiasm, I did enjoy the performances on show - enough to keep me engaged and interested throughout anyway. Still, that isn't quite enough to make this a film I can recommend, but if you have a chance to watch it on DVD with your other half then I guess it could provide some feel good factor for a Sunday night or something.

Film: Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part 1

You've probably already heard how dark and serious and, from some people, boring the first part of the seventh and final film in the series is. Personally I would probably agree with the first assessment, partly agree with the second one and disagree with the last. I'm going to assume people have read the book (if you haven't, then you should) so consider this your spoiler warning.

So yes. It's dark. People die. Hormones rage. You get involved, feel the pain, hate the bad guys. This is more the fault of the book the film is based on than the film itself so in many ways was the be expected really

That said, I thought it had some very poignant light hearted and even funny moments. Most of these were borne out of the teen angst that is finally coming to a head, but even apart from that there was plenty of the wizardry and magic I thought might have been missing from a chapter not based in Hogwarts.

And so overall I didn't find the film boring at all. Yes, the acting was still painful to watch with some of the scenes as cringe-worthy as they come. But this was Harry Potter through and through and for fans an absolute treat. Recommended.

Book of the Dead

The British Museum is currently hosting an exhibition outlining what can only be described as the death process of the Ancient Egyptians. Most of the gathered information was acquired from the study of their various Books of the Dead (there's more than one? How anti-climatic), a death manual upper class Egyptians were often buried with. The book was actually a collection of both instructions (for burial etc) and spells (for various protections and benefits in the after-life) which also itself served as a talisman for they who was being buried.

I guess the biggest issue I had with the exhibition was that of scope. Although death is morbidly exciting (of sorts), there isn't really much to talk about it once you've covered the basics, and as such I felt a lot of the points being made by the various exhibits were slightly laboured. My seven year old nephew certainly lost a lot of his initial interest by the first room. He certainly enjoyed his short time in the museum a lot more, and that despite being given the opportunity to collect spells and create his own Book of the Dead (which in hindsight is pretty scary).

Of course there were some gems which had to be seen, most of them the larger caskets, sarcophaguses and mummys, and in some ways it was worth going just to see those. However as my co-attendee pointed out, the museum itself already had multiple rooms dedicated to these things.

So in conclusion I guess my advice is to spend your time checking out the rest of the museum instead - if only the Egyptian bits if you like.

New Music

Chains - Tina Arena

Don't worry, I'm as shocked as you are. I think I actually fell for Tina Arena when she sung this. And also: 1995!

XKCD

When I do this, it's called stalking. But semantics aside: Just Do It.

Film: Skyline

Oh dear. I wanted to like this film, honestly I did. I like the whole humanity uniting to face the aliens thing, and so it doesn't take much to have me cheerleading the characters in such a film.

This time around, I actually wanted Man to lose. Anything to cut this film short - at times it was as if Skyline knew exactly how much pain it was inflicting and was getting some kind of perverse pleasure out of it.

Perhaps I'm being a little unfair though: there were a few - no wait, there were only two - quite enjoyable set pieces, but without a decent plot, context or even blummin' special effects (where was the money spent? Certainly not on the actors), those faded from memory as soon as they were over.

Anyway, I'm wasting time just writing about this. Not recommended.

Food: Cafe at 104

Small and cosy, Cafe at 104 offers a decent Turkish menu for an equally decent price. It's local (in the geographical sense) food at its best, with good, fast and friendly service, a clean and intimate dining area and lots of choice on offer. Who needs to go into town when you have a place like this up the road?

Granted, you won't get more than the party of four we had in there, but with a bill not hitting a tenner a head (with starters but no drinks), this is pretty much something you want to keep a secret anyway.

Recommended.

Film: Due Date

Following on from the surprise hit (well for me anyway) The Hangover, Due Date is pretty much more of the same bromance-road-movie lark that we saw over a year ago.

The farce this time is made up of the contrasting characters - the uptight and always correct Peter (played by the now legendary Robert Downey Jr.) and the irritating failure personified in the form of Ethan (played by the equally awesome Zach Galifianakis). Make no mistake, everyone else just plays bit-parts in the wake of these two.

Hilarious, crazy and yet all too real, Due Date manages to hit that spot of your funny bone where you're genuinely laughing out loud because you want to rather than because you feel that you have to. It's a refreshing brand of humour that you can't help but enjoy. The fact that it's polished too sets this film apart from that other brand of funny film from the likes of Rogen and all.

Absolutely genius. Recommended.

Film: Action Replayy

A bollywood flick involving time travel was never going to be taken too seriously, but just in case it needs to be said: yes, this film was pretty ludicrous. But stranger things have happened, and if there's enough love, fun and dance in an Indian film there is always a chance that it could get away with it.

Alas Action Replayy didn't quite manage it. I was certainly fun, and a few times I did laugh out loud (and then, with it rather than at it). The love story however was very weak and the songs a mixed bunch with some excellent tunes alongside some really dire ones.

Both Akshay Kumar and Aishwarya Rai led the way through the film, with the latter looking especially good despite the quality of the film she was in. Oh and a nod of the head to Sudeepa Singh for, well, just being there. Oh and it does get bonus points for that catchphrase.

So yes. Pretty much a waste of time really. Just download the music videos if that's your thing.

New Music

Just The Way You Are - Bruno Mars

This is one of those songs that makes me want someone just so I can sing it to them. Or something like that anyway.