New Music

Johal Boliyan - Kulwinder Singh Johal feat. Raman Aujla

Seeing as it's been riding the top of the charts for weeks now it's kinda embarrassing that it's taken so long for Johal Boliyan to hit my playlist, but better late than never eh? Pure bhangra, slightly derivative but fun all the same.

Video of the Day

I suspect only a small subset of people will fully appreciate the following; that is those who both know how much Twilight blows and how awesome the 8-bit era actually was:



It's actually an interactive game, so make sure you click through to YouTube to get the full experience.

New Music

Ranjha Ranjha - Raavan

Maybe it's just me but there's something dark about this track. Maybe it's just the backing music, but the to and froing of the lyricists kinda discerns me too.

Bheegi Si Bhaagi Si - Raajneeti

Contrary to the above, this is much more poppy and... flowery. I quite like the two phase stuff Bollywood is coming out with lately.

Game: Super Street Fighter IV (360)

You know, it's not often that buying into a game makes me feel dirty. Being an almost professional cynic, I tend to ignore spin offs and cash ins, choosing instead to spend my time and money on other games and things.

But I do have one weakness, and that's Street Fighter. It's the game I've spent the most number of hours with, the game that I was the best at, and as such I need to be involved with any version that will ever get released, ever.

Which is why, almost a year after I received the awesome SFIV, I am here with the Super variant - and as much as Capcom would love to deny it, this is nothing more than a bonus disc. Still, at least it was cheap, and at least I sold my SFIV.

But what of the game? Well it's the same thing with bells. The new characters do indeed add masses of value to the game, Juri especially being fun to both play as and against, while the doubling of Ultras and rebalancing per character add a freshness to the existing characters. There are extra modes stashed away in the online play mode, but as someone who thinks these kind of games should be played with people in the same room, I find these to be quite irrelevant (and frustrating - surely it would have been easy enough to implement these party features offline?).

But overall it is just Street Fighter IV again, although I have no regrets buying this if only to have what is clearly a more well rounded and complete game. A definite buy for those who don't have SFIV, but slightly less so for those who do. Just wait until it hits fifteen quid or something.

New Music

Africa - Toto

A classic, of which I was reminded of while watching this clip.

New Music

Pehli Nazar Mein - Race

Most of the last few picks have been me filling certain gaps in my play list, so apologies for yet another Bollywood track from two years ago. Naturally, the weekend's wedding reminded me of this one.

Film: Death at a Funeral

Although it's terribly random, Death at a Funeral is a funny film too. Plot-wise it's very tight - on paper not much happens in the house of seven or eight main characters, and yet the situation is leveraged well enough to last the hour and a half running time. The acting is adequate and nothing more than you would expect from stand up comedians, while technically the film has been solidly put together.

Plenty of jokes makes Death at a Funeral a worthy enough watch for a Sunday afternoon, so if you're looking for a giggle then you can't really go wrong here.

Cyanide & Happiness

Around one out of twenty people I know tell me I'd be more successful with the ladies if I shaved.



One day I may crack. The funny thing is that I've always said there would only ever be two women in my life who could ask me to shave for whom I would gladly do so.

Nicked off Steve's Buzz. The strip itself is pretty good too.

Food: Guanabana

Halal Caribbean and Latin food? Of course! The fact that we happened to be in the area at the time made picking this for dinner a no-brainier; and it turned out to be quite a good pick too.

Curried goat, fajitas, messy burgers and jerk chicken were all on the menu and between the six of us we managed to try quite a few dishes. The starters were slightly disappointing both in terms of size and taste, but the mains made up for that.

Service was a bit slow and sub-par - we had to get our glasses changed twice due to lipstick and various other stains. On the other hand a prayer mat was duly provided once I asked for space in which to pray. All restaurants get points for doing that.

At 14 quid a head (and we stuck to water) I would say Guanabana lacks the value for money I've seen elsewhere, but for the novelty or for those who want something different this place certainly hits the spot.

Film: 4.3.2.1

After the excellent Kidulthood and not so excellent Adulthood comes another film about life as a kid on the streets of London. Thievery, guns, sex, violence and even lesbianism all make an appearance as we are told the story of three days in the life of four girlfriends.

Each arc is shown linearly, with the tape "rewinding" at the end of each, and this parallelism lends itself to some wonderful storytelling as mysteries are both uncovered and solved. Add to that some excellent acting by faces known from the past two films and you end with a pretty gritty, yet fun, crime thriller.

Well made, this is really the film Adulthood should have been. Totally recommended, so make sure you catch it while you can.

Joke of the Day

Two old ladies were sitting on a park bench when a man in a trench coat came up and flashed them. One old lady immediately had a stroke. The other couldn't quite reach.

Via Steve's Facebook.

Saying Goodbye in Dubai

And just like that, our time in the UAE was over. Quite cleverly on the part of the airline we were able to check in at their office in Dubai; they even took our luggage off our hands. Kudos to Etihad, particularly as the transfer itself was free. Our plan was to get into Abu Dhabi early in order to check out the Shaikh Zayed Mosque; on asking the bus driver for advice on how to get there from the airport, he told us he'd drop us off himself. Result.

The Shaikh Zayed Mosque itself was pretty nice. Grand and clean, it definitely looked the part. Personally I felt it lacked the sheer awesomeness of Hassan II, but I was still glad I was able to check it out.

And just like that, our time in the UAE was over. The two and a bit days had, unsurprisingly, flown by, yet as I got on the plane I felt happy that I had come, feelings that contrasted with the frustration I had on arrival. We got a lot done in more ways than one (business, sightseeing and socialising) and there wasn't really much I could have complained about.

But now that I'm back I really do promise not to go anywhere ever again. Well not for the next six months anyway.

Book: The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo, Stieg Larsson

It's clear from the start of this book, even after reading the title in fact, that it's more about the characters and experiences they go through rather than any thrilling crime promised by the genre it falls into. That's not to say that the story isn't thrilling; it is, and I genuinely wanted to know who was behind everything and how they would be brought to justice and all that jazz.

But as adequate as the story can be, it won't in itself bring characters to life. And although TGWTDT does a fair job of breathing life into its main protagonists, it falls quite a way short of making them as believable as those you personally know in real life. It could be the context, but I suspect that it was more to do with the deliberate, and so cheap, ways in which the author attempts to trick his readers into falling for his characters. Flaws aren't indicative if they're handed to you on a platter, and impossible knowledge and cheating don't help a protagonist appear any more real than them being able to fly would.

Technically the book is well enough written, with various arcs being explored and tied up in a fair manner. I will say that there's a lot of time pass and guff that could have been discarded, but that's a minor fault really.

Overall I feel that the book fails in what it sets out to achieve, but despite that manages to entertain well enough. I will be reading the next two books anyway, so from me I guess that more or less counts as some kind of recommendation.

Dossing in Dubai

The things bout impromptu holidays and trips like these is that they provide an opportunity to see friends and family for what feels like free. With that in mind my parents and I joined the family of a friend of mine for lunch. It was nice to be able to relax in someone's home, as a guest and not a tourist, and memories of South Africa came flooding back.

After some lunch and hanging out talking about random stuff (including a dancing pathan), we all headed out for some falooda. The stuff we actually got was unlike any falooda I've ever had - we ate it out of a bowl instead of drinking it from a cup. It was nice anyway and just hanging out in a dirty Pakistani dessert place was fun enough.

Since my parents had other, more grown up, people to see I hung back with my friends. After a quick look at the beach (in short it wasn't as nice as those in Durban) we headed out to what now seemed like the centre of my UAE Universe, the Dubai Mall. Our reason this time was to ice skate, something I never thought I'd be doing in an Arab country; the average temperature over the past three days or so was 40C. Nevertheless I was impressed by the talent of the natives.

But time was once again up and I had to go join my parents for dinner at a family friend's house. Once again today had proven that although for me Dubai kinda sucks as a tourist attraction, any time that I spend here has always eventually been made worth it by the hospitality and company of the locals - and more than that how I increasingly prefer to go away to see people rather than places.

Touring in Dubai

It took a couple of hours this morning to clear all the boring work stuff. After we were done, we got on to the relatively new Dubai Metro and headed to Dubai Mall to continue the brief visit we had paid it last night. Our priority was to go up the Burj, but we were told that there was plenty of other stuff to do there to soak up the time. Since we had booked tickets for the 7:30pm session we had a fair few hours to kill.

We managed to catch one of the hourly fountain shows outside. With the Burj in the background we enjoyed various water works all choreographed with music (apparently each show has a different global theme) and although the fountains themselves were quite impressive with how high up they squirted the stuff, the show as a whole seemed a bit bland.

We decided to check out the aquarium. To be honest I was amazed at how the managed to fit such a wonderful tank (and underwater tunnel) smack bang in the middle of a shopping mall, but there it was. I was happy to just sit outside and point at the fish from the public area but since we had time we went in too. The tunnel was exactly what you would have expected, but the underwater zoo turned out to be a pretty cool part of the experience; they had quite a few weird species of fish, a lot of which I hadn't seen before. Topped off with a ride in glass bottomed boat along the top surface of the tank and I'd say the whole deal was actually pretty fun.

But at last it was time to head up the Burj Khalifa. Unlike other observatories, this one seems to have been designed from the ground up for tourists and it was quite nice to read all the facts and figures about the building and construction process as we headed to the lift to take us up to the 124th floor.

If I'm totally honest, the view up there wasn't particularly stunning. Perhaps it was how Dubai is a desert, or maybe the fact that we were there at night, but there wasn't really much to see and neither was there a sense of the great height we were at. We did get to see another fountain show, this time from above, and it was quite nice to have been out on the open terrace instead of behind a window as in other observatories.

Heading back down, our time at the Dubai Mall was over. I still don't know how we managed to spend six hours there, and that without visiting more than a couple of shops (including the wonderful Candylicious). Content with our sightseeing, we headed off to the house of some family for a late dinner. Now that the business and sightseeing was out of the way, tomorrow was reserved for chilling out with friends.

Three Nights in Dubai

Despite promising myself never to leave the country again (well not for the next couple of months anyway), I've found myself having to go to the UAE for some work related stuff. It's a bit annoying actually - it's a bit disruptive for one thing and will be too short to make a proper holiday out of it (the only reason we're staying so long is because it would be too expensive to fly back sooner). Still, at least I'm going with my parents so it won't be all that bad.

We landed in Abu Dhabi quite late and waited a while for our lift to Sharjah. The drive was pretty uneventful until we got into Dubai proper - despite my misgivings about this trip I knew it would be an opportunity to see the brand new Burj Kilafa. It was an awesome sight, far more exciting and unreal than any of the other "tallest buildings in the world" I have had the fortune of seeing in person.

Detecting our wonderment, our kind host treated us to a brief stop off at the adjoining Dubai Mall where we had dinner (courtesy of Burger King) and were able to check out the Burj on foot. It was even more impressive up close; it's not often that I've had to crane my neck to see the top of a building, and even at a few hundred metres away I couldn't get the whole building in my field of vision. Amazing stuff.

But it was late and so we headed off. I didn't have much sightseeing to do here in Dubai (both my parents and me have been here before) but the Burj and Mall were definitely on the list of things to spend some more time checking out.

Desert Island Spouse

As all good theories about marriage come about this one was also born over a home cooked dinner with a bunch of clever mates. Although it doesn't matter much to the content of this post, this idea did come about during a meal in South Africa. I guess there's no holiday for marriage talk.

The question was regarding how to know if someone was right for you. That you "just know" wasn't really good enough, especially during a time when people already married for a few years who also "just knew" are also claiming that they should have "known better". Faced with this question, I offered the desert island test.

The trick would be to find someone with whom you could live on a desert island, alone. A remote mountain also works, but the point is that you would have no other worldly inputs or distractions. You would grow your own food, and work to live rather than getting your name on a business card or magazine, and the goings on of anything outside of the island would not be of any concern to you. Your only interactive input and output would be with your partner (and maybe a pet hamster).

Would you get bored in this situation? Or for those who are already married, could you survive under such conditions?

What I was essentially trying to do was to normalise relationships, and remove the guff that many of us think contributes to one, but doesn't really. On a desert island, it really is the person who matters and nothing else. Of course in this day and age it's an unrealistic test, but the idea itself tends to frighten the hell out of some people.

As soppy and naive as it sounds, there was once a time when for the typical Joe and Jane on the street the only thing that mattered in life was to find a good partner (where "good" means many things) and raise a family with them. That's really just about it and everything else, including jobs or pastimes, were just incidental. But increasingly nowadays marriage isn't about finding someone around whom your world revolves, but instead someone who fits in with your already defined sense of self and individuality. We now want someone to add and enhance the lives we have already built or are building and marriage is now merely one part of many which makes up who a person is: so X is now a successful, smart intelligent and strong person who, as an aside, happens to also be married to Y.

Things like obedience and devotion are now seen as weaknesses, signs that a person isn't an individual. We now have to think about ensuring our survival without relying on the people we've committed to, and as such partners are no longer necessary to complete ourselves. There was a time when phrases like "she's at the centre of my universe" and "we were made for each other" where in common use, when women would dream about taking on the surnames of the guy they were in love with. And when they eventually did cement their relationship, as long as these people had each other nothing else mattered to them. But alas it seems that these concepts have now been relegated to unrealistic or outdated ideas or fictional romanticism (I'm looking at you, Twilight). It's not that this state is unachievable, but more that it's undesirable.

However I'm not suggesting that society has it wrong. What goes into a good and strong relationship, and indeed what a relationship is, evolves over time and means different things as we progress. In that sense the desert island test is simply just out of date, something which refers to a highly idealised and possibly over-demanding view of marriage and romance that has no place in this day and age.

That said I certainly don't think reaching such a state is impossible in this day and age - looking at the popularity of stuff like Twilight (spit) anyone would think that old fashioned romance is all anyone wants. I guess the trick to a happy relationship is, as always, to find the one person who has the same view and needs of hooking up, getting married and becoming a spouse as you do, no matter what level of involvement that actually entails.

Game: Super Mario Galaxy 2 (Wii)

It seems like yesterday that I took delivery of the first Super Mario Galaxy, a game I swore was the best thing ever at the time. And it was good, except I found myself losing interest once I had gotten to the end of the story mode; I still have 40 stars or so to collect, but it either became too difficult or too much of a chore to carry on with.

Which is why SMG2 is so surprising. Despite clearly being well rooted in the first game (squint and you can't really tell the difference), it feels much more fresh, much more straight forward than SMG. The levels seems tighter and more straightforward (while retaining all of the fun), and it seems less reliant on non-classic Mario mechanisms than SMG - there's no confusing starship hub, now replaced by a more linear world map; random appearance of comets are now replaced by collectable tokens and bits which should be played in 2D (which actually happens quite often) have to be played in 2D. It's like they've cut out all the fluff of the first game.

Of course it's early days for me yet, having collected less than ten stars. The boredom/time sapping characteristic of the first game could still creep in. But in my old age I don't seem to mind this as much; so I miss a few stars and that coveted 100% I used to need... it's the journey to the end that will make this a wonderful game to play.

Video of the Day

Total class.



Of course the genius is in how true it all is. Oh and make sure you check out The 9 Ways to Treat a Woman by the same peeps.

Nicked of Gareth's Facebook.

24

Like Lost, I had come late to 24. Still, the way in which I could sit and watch the whole of the first season in a single weekend confirmed to me that this would be a show I would always enjoy. And now that it's ended, it has definitely made my top five shows ever, alongside Buffy and TNG.

Compared to the season finale of Lost yesterday, I didn't find the final episode of 24 as fulfilling or good. It felt a bit rushed and unfair, with Jack not getting the closure or recognition he deserved. Nevertheless it would always have been difficult to top a show that had been so awesome otherwise.

The biggest draw with 24 was the way it was able to twist its storyline, As someone who tends to see plot lines a mile off 24 was one of the rare shows that was able to shock and surprise, at some moments even prompting me to get off the sofa in excitement. There have been some excellent and classic TV moments, and although some may call them unrealistic or even cheap, I've not found the same kind of excitement in any other show.

Much was said about 24's realtimeness, the way in which an hour show showed the events of an hour, the 24 episodes of a season, a day. For me this wasn't really a relevant attribute of the series; in fact I still maintain that it would have been a lot better without this unnecessary burden, sometimes leading to filler. None of the good bits of the show relied on the fact it was in real time, and it ended up being a bit of a gimmick more than anything else.

I know a few people who refuse to watch 24 due to its portrayal of Muslims. I think that at least three of the eight seasons (including the last) involved Muslims in some way. I didn't seem to mind this as much, perhaps because I'm able to detach or see TV for what it is, but aside from that for every bad guy they also had a goody representing the other side, or an even bigger non-Muslim threat. Toward the end of S7, it even got to the stage where Jack became quite involved in Islam. So I wasn't that bothered by the whole religious commentary of the show; in fact I was more annoyed by the constant and not-so-subtle product placement.

Ah. Jack. I take my first paragraph back actually - it was Jack who was the main draw of 24. The perfect hero - he was strong and capable but always measured in way that transcended policy or law. His sense of justice was pure and active - he wouldn't be concerned with silly laws or rules designed and enforced by corrupt and weak people. He always did what was right, even if that meant him suffering himself. As one of the bad guys once realised: Jack really was the best.

Lost Without Lost

Although it's only been running for six seasons (even though it lasted seven), it feels as if Lost has been running for much longer. Perhaps it was just the epic feel of the whole thing, or maybe it had something to do with the final episode (sorry, I can't talk about it much) this morning, but for some reason it's almost as if something will now be missing from my television schedule.

I loved Lost. And I'm not even sure I understand what actually happened in it; and coming from someone who insists on having a full and total understanding of anything he watches that says a lot. It's almost like I've learned one of the main lessons in the show (sorry, I can't talk about it much).

It wasn't always plain sailing though. The success of the mystery leave-them-hanging format in the first season appeared to have gone to the heads of the makers, with season two and three both having been heavily criticised for being a bit too much bait and not enough story. Still, the massive loss of confidence and resulting drop in ratings seemed to have done the trick and Lost returned even better from season four onwards. Unlike other shows, it had learned it's lesson, and now, after watching the whole thing, I've realised how long their game plan was.

The final episode was pretty much perfect (sorry, I can't talk about it much), and if I was a lesser man I would have been in tears throughout. Pathetic as it sounds I even begun to miss a few of the characters (not least Kate), if not the Island and surrounding myth itself.

Lost goes to show that sometimes it's not about the story or getting from introduction to conclusion but more about the characters and their interactions. Who cares if certain things aren't answered, or if there are things that don't really make sense? That's not really the point.

As it stands Lost was a brilliant show, one that was perfectly timed, and after skipping the first play of season one, I'm definitely glad I decided to watch it in the end.

EDIT: One of the best write-ups I can find is here, on Kotaku of all places. The comments make for excellent reading too.

Abstruse Goose

I've written before about how Star Trek has had an effect on my life, although I was surprised when reading Abstruse Goose this morning:



And there I was thinking I was the only one who followed the Prime Directive...

Film: Four Lions

A black comedy about four jihadists was always going to be a little iffy. That said Four Lions manages to tread the line between taking the mick and causing offence quite well, and I didn't come away thinking how wrong the makers had gotten it.

Since it's not offensive, it must be funny right? Well yes and no really. There's no doubt that some of the one-liners will eventually reach classic status, destined to be repeated amongst groups of Muslim people, and some of the sketches were genuinely hilarious. But although I did laugh out loud plenty of times, most of them were pretty shallow and so very short lived. I guess I was expecting something a little more sophisticated.

The same goes for the message of the film - it's pretty non-existent really. This might be a good thing as we avoid all the sticky situations of moral, ethical and religious dilemma and just stick to the laughs, but it did contribute overall to the shallowness of the film.

Riz Ahmed was excellent as usual, as were his support; They clearly had a good time making the film (although I did sometimes have trouble understanding their accents). It was well put together too, and I had no complaints about the technical side of the movie.

Overall this wasn't quite the film I would have liked it to be. Nevertheless, it gets a recommendation both for the novelty and cheap gags, but if you miss it at the cinema don't worry: a DVD watch will be just as rewarding.

Film: Prince of Persia

The game of the same name on which this film is based on remains a firm favourite of mine. I think the thing which did it for me was the simplicity of it all; there was no convoluted plot, or controls that required hours of play to master. Difficult was challenging but in a simple, non frustrating way, and the total playtime didn't mean I had to quit work in order to see it through.

The film managed to retain a lot of these back to basics qualities. It was easy on the eye and brain equally (with many of its plot twists seen a mile off), and offered a level of fun which some films tend to look over. However since you tend to interact with a film less that you would a game, the lack of sophistication also meant a less of an engaging experience overall.

Technically the film failed on a few levels. I'm not quite sure who appeared in the film more Gyllenhaal or his stunt double, the special effects were bad and the editing left a lot to be desired. I'm not even sure the ending made that much sense either. Still, at least Gemma Arterton looked okay. I didn't even mind that she wasn't Persian.

Overall then although not really a classic, Prince of Persia did do enough to get away with being fun; just about anyway. It's hardly unmissable though, so perhaps it'd be best to stick to DVD with this one.

Extreme Prevention & Walls

Despite wanting to, I've never really got the chance to go to a Muju performance before. I guess the thing which prompted me to go this time was that half of the show was going to be them putting on a piece by Alia Bano of Shades fame.

Walls went on for twenty minutes and was about two best mates, one a not-so-practising Muslim and the other a rich Jew and how the latter planning to leave for Israel affects their relationship. Twenty minutes wasn't enough to explore this whole set up properly, although as a basis for something larger (the writer insisted that it was a work in progress) the promise was certainly there.

Clearly not as polished as Shades was, there was much left to be desired about all aspects of the performance. The script wasn't stellar (although there were a few gems), the plot slightly forced and construed, and the acting a bit shabby (I noticed a few forgotten lines and fluffs). Still seeing as how Muju is a charity where most of the human resources are volunteers, it would have been a bit unreasonable to expect a full theatrical performance.

The second half of the evening was spent on a series of comedy sketches titled "Extreme Prevention". I can't remember any which I didn't laugh hard at, and I was surprised at how far some of the jokes went - both the suggestion to abort a potential terrorist foetus and the Jew who had a bagel stuck on his, well, you know thing raised a couple of eyebrows between my giggles. I was more glad that the show wasn't worried about pushing the boundary just because it had a faith element in its constitution. In that sense it was braver and so more effective than some of the other "Muslim comedy" I've had the chance to check out. I especially liked how both Prevent and Quilliam got a good knocking. About time.

All in all I was quite impressed by Muju and what they had come up with. Not only were they quite talented as an amateur group, but they managed to avoid most of the pitfalls that come with faith based initiatives; something the probably achieved by virtue of leaping off more than one faith. I look forward to what they have to offer next.

Video of the Day

I've always said that you can learn a lot from videogames.



In this case, that the shortest path to the end game isn't to save the princess.

Food: Baharat

Indian or Turkish? Don't really know what you fancy? Well head down to Baharat down in South Woodford; it seems to have a decent enough selection from both.

We stuck to the "Mediterranean" menu, and then just to the starters. This turned out to be quite a good idea since it gave us a chance to sample quite a bit of the menu, including pastries, chicken wings and even calamari. All were of a standard enough quality.

Baharat was a nice enough place to eat in. It's pretty intimate (read: dead), and I probably enjoyed the Bollywood soundtrack a bit more than others would. The service was prompt and polite and overall there wasn't much to complain about.

The flexibility we got in sticking to starters was reflected in the price as we ended up paying a tenner or so a head, a decent price considering the way in which we had ordered.

Overall Baharat is little more than an above standard Indian with some of the usual twists on its menu. This makes it a safe bet and for those of you living in the area when looking for a place to get a good bite to eat.

Snippet

Shak says (12:47):
    everyone saying about this muslim bird...
    "she's so pretty..... shame she's so skinny"
    either we're the only honest ones.... or we have an aquired taste
xxxx says (12:48):
    nup
    any girl who says that ias just jealous
    any guy who says that
[...]
    is either gay
    or knows women will be reading/listning
    and will want them to think that he doenst endorse model-skinny type figures
Shak says (12:49):
    so we're actually keeping it real?
xxxx says (12:49):
    there;'s a reason why models are skinny
    men like skinny girls
    any guy who says he doesnt
    is lying
    gay
    or just a chubby chaser

Snippet

xxxx says (08:25):
    all women are the same
    piece of advice to you
    never believe anything a woman tells you
Shak says (08:25):
    wah
xxxx says (08:25):
    so when you meeting these women
xxxx says (08:26):
    dont feel bad about lying
    long as it gets you a fit wife that's all that matters
    cos she'll be lying as well
xxxx says (08:28):
    in fact ... why do you even need to get married at all
    if you want kids ... you can have kids without getting married
Shak says (08:29):
    how?
xxxx says (08:30):
    is it against the law for yo
    or against your religino
Shak says (08:30):
    in what sense?
xxxx says (08:30):
    as in
    can you find a girl
    and have kids with her
    and not get married

[...]

Shak says (08:37):
    of course not. no sex before marriage innit?
xxxx says (08:37):
    hmmmm

Film: Hot Tub Time Machine

Poor taste, nonsensical, badly acted, awful editing, an insulting storyline and numerous plot holes that the makers didn't even try to fill... these were all attributes of a film that really shouldn't have made it past the conceptual stage.

And yet I didn't really care because I was laughing so hard. Think 80's lowbrow comedy and you'll understand what Hot Tub is.

So either I'm still an immature kid who finds really stupid things funny or the film manages to exude that unique magic that always overrides logic. Whatever happens to be the case, I can't help but recommend Hot Tub Time Machine. And if you don't happen to find it that funny... well then you just simply have no soul.